Electronic toys in children’s playrooms always going off spontaneously in the middle of the night
“Didn’t get a wink of sleep last night “ grumbled Pooh.“Nor me “ yawned Piglet as they wandered through the Forest. “ You mean other nights you do?” said Eeyore with amazement. “I haven’t had a whole night’s sleep ever since that Buzz Lightyear found his way into our toybox .” “Him and his ‘ To infinity and beyond’ going off every five minutes ,”agreed Pooh .”Was I glad when his battery ran out.” “ That’s electronic devices for you , said Eeyore . “ They have these little surges of power left in them even after you’ve switched them off and it doesn’t take much to set them off : how many times did you hear ‘Twinkle Twinkle Little Star ” last night? ” Exactly,” said Pooh . “And then if it’s not Thomas the Tank Engine’s wheels deciding to have a little spin it’s that that infuriating little drummer boy banging away like the Russians had reached Wigan.”“To say nothing of that robot dog scratching itself ” added Piglet“ Don’t even go there “, said Pooh . “ What are we living in – a nursery or an amusement arcade ?” “Electronics , you see “ said Eeyore “No substitute for real life.”“Your point being ?” said Pooh.“That all children like to indulge the fantasy that their toys are real so they like them to be fitted with batteries and microchips and little motors inside them which programme them to move on their own ,walk and talk and cry and all that reality stuff”, Eeyore explained.” It’s pathetic really.” “ I can do all that ,” said Pooh “Does that mean I’ve got a battery then ? ”“Not you , no ,” said Eeyore .” If you had a battery all you’d be able to say is “Tiddely-pom” or “I love honey” – no, you’re real enough .”“You mean I’m not just a stuffed animal after all ? ”.“You’re no more a stuffed animal than me and Piglet here.
You’re real enough to go on to become famous storybook character. ““ Do real-life creatures like us really become storybook characters?” gasped Pooh. “Of course ,” said Eeyore ,his eyes rolling in exasperation at such ignorance .” I mean to say …do bears..? “
(Janice Nobutt , Braintree) - QQQQ*
